Tuesday, January 28, 2014

hashtag: Transformation Tuesday

Seriously weather? I have had about enough of your shenanigans. It's cold again today. Like 7 degrees cold. Thanks to my friend "polar vortex" the thought of leaving my house for any reason is unbearable, so we are going on day two of being inside all day. The Littles did fine yesterday, but today is putting more of a damper on their toddlerhood. Luckily they have not grown tired of dancing and twirling in the living room, which has kept them occupied all morning. Normally Pickle requests Veggie Tales for our dance sessions, but the past two weeks all he has wanted to hear is our Perma, Two of a Crime album on vinyl{seriously proud mama over here}. I happily oblige each and every time. I have a serious lady crush on Sherri Bemis. I have also had to explain at least 1,000 times now to Pickle that it is way too cold to go to the library today and he has to wait until Thursday when the forecast is a lovely 46 degrees. I love more than almost anything that he LOVES the library. I mean really though, who wouldn't? Our library has books and trains with tracks for him to play.

Since today is Tuesday, I thought I might share a little bit of my story for "Transformation Tuesday"
This is me at around 220 pounds in December 2012
This is me at 140 pounds in December 2013
(look at how BIG my Buggy is now!)

I have now roughly lost 85 pounds. This is a huge, giant, amazing accomplishment! I don't think I have ever been more proud of myself in my entire life. It was the first picture that actually made me realize how miserable I was. I wasn't just miserable because of my weight either, but the person I had allowed myself to become. I was withdrawn, anxious, shy and quite honestly a doormat that other people stepped on repeatedly. I looked at this photo and thought "this is not me." And it wasn't me at all. It was a shell. I looked at that picture and knew that something had to change, I had to change. I was not happy and I couldn't be the wife and mother that I wanted to be if I wasn't even happy with myself. I was tired of letting people treat me poorly too. I didn't respect myself, so why on earth would anyone else give me respect. That was the moment I can look back on and say "this is when it all changed". I took a stand. I changed my life. It is so empowering to look at the second photo and know how damn hard I worked. I love everything I see in the photo. I see myself again. I see my strength and perseverance. This has not been an easy road. I have wanted to give up so many times. I still have problems with binge eating(more on that another time) and trigger foods. This hasn't been a means to an end sort of journey. There is no end. This is a lifestyle change. I will work at being healthy every single day. For my husband and Littles, but mostly for myself. There is so much more that I am working toward, but it feels good to look back a little and know that I CAN DO ANYTHING with Jesus, my husband by my side, and coffee.

All My Love, 

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